Breast cancer

Breast Cancer Free!

- robin

It has been a long week. I just cannot seem to get past DRs appointments and tests. My phone just beeped with a reminder about an appointment, NEXT Friday. (It drives me MAD!)

This week I had a diagnostic mammogram. It is an extensive mammogram for people like me. Each year I am nervous as a cat getting breast cancer tests. Being diagnosed twice is enough…The anxiety during this time, is off the charts.

Photo: Nervous cat

During and after my surgeries and treatments….no one ever suggested a Breast Cancer Group to me. I found out recently that that every patient should be informed of “groups” where you can share difficult things that you have in common. I believe that every woman going through this needs someone to talk to. ( I found a DR on my own and went to see her often)

The good news is, I am breast cancer free. The mammograms from this week have been read and I am done for ONE YEAR! (Remission is a happy word) I am happy, but still nervous, not sure the dread will ever go away completely.

The point of sharing all of this is..

  1. Please get your mammogram, for me.
  2. If you know someone who has gone through breast cancer treatment, is going through treatment or just in remission, reach out? It would mean the world to both of you.

I would like to thank the friends who stuck by me and supported me when I was struggling. It meant so much to me then and means the world now.

Have a wonderful day.

Love you beyond the moon.

Me

TEAM BELIEVE

- robin

Team Believe is ten years old and has gathered many members over the past years. Team believe has walked 100’s of miles in PINK walks, quarter marathons and has also auctioned off paintings and raffled quilts. It has been my honor to be part of TEAM BELIEVE.

I am alone this year in TEAM BELIEVE, but Larry is by my side…and look what he got for me.

Photo: Front of TEAM BELIEVE shirt
Photo: Back of TEAM BELIEVE shirt

He had my design made into a 2022 baseball shirt. I have it on today and plan to wear it to all of my oncology appointments this month.

Please schedule your mammogram? AND if you have any questions or need support of any kind, please contact me? Email me at………[email protected]

Many, many TV stations show mammograms and how easy they are….they never show what it is like to get bad news from your mammogram. I know what that is like and I am here if you have questions, need support or names of my favorite DRs.

Early detection can save your life.

Love you beyond the moon.

Me

Dear Katie Couric, Welcome to Team Believe

- robin

Dear Katie Couric,

Good morning. My name is Robin Tolbert, and I have been thinking about you since the announcement came out this week, sharing that you had been diagnosed with breast cancer, had surgery and treatment. I wanted to officially welcome you to Team Believe.

It is October 1st and that means Breast Cancer Awareness Month has begun. Each October, I agitate my readers with statistics and reminders to have their screenings. Early detection saves lives, it has saved mine twice.

My first experience was almost exactly like yours. (even the timing of surgery and treatment) My tumor was also bigger than expected, like yours and treatment identical. I am so glad that you are doing well and moving forward in the best way possible. It is often difficult after hearing the word cancer. Life will never quite be the same.

I am the Mother of two beautiful daughters and one amazing granddaughter. Along with my husband, sons in laws and loving friends, we make up the very supportive and positive TEAM BELIEVE.

Photo: Team Believe~Robin and daughters~ From Left: Lauren, Robin, Matilda and Jamison.

During this process, life has dramatic ups and downs. To be a survivor, it is just part of the job. Surrounding yourself with people who understand, is a gift you can give yourself…but I am sure that you already know these things.

Well, Katie. here is what I have learned being a two time survivor: Do everything that your DR says, Listen to your body, Laugh out loud every day, Share your breast cancer experience with others, Cry when you feel like it-cancer is NOT FAIR, and remember that love is the best medicine.

Thank you for allowing me to write to you on the first day of Breast Cancer Awareness month and know that so many of us have you in our thoughts and prayers as your continue your breast cancer journey.

Welcome to TEAM BELIEVE….

Always, Robin

Nine Years Ago

- robin

Nine years ago, this week, (2012) I was diagnosed with breast cancer. (aggressive ductal carcinoma, stage 2) My life has never been the same. My faith is stronger, my relationships are wonderful and I get the chance to remind everyone to get their yearly screenings. (hint, hint)

I was diagnosed for the second time on a Friday morning in October 2019. Remember? It was the weekend that a tree went through our roof during straight line winds. To be honest, the second diagnoses has shaken my world. That was two years ago and nothing feels quite right yet.

Larry reminds me that I am older this time…I love Larry!

My days are wonderful, I adore my husband, my daughters are truly gifts from God. Maybe I am just expecting to much? Maybe it is because I have dodged the cancer bullet twice when so many women are struggling with their first diagnoses.

I feel guilty when I ignore my cancers and I feel guilty when I talk about them. We are all so different…and handle things in our own unique way. There is not a right or wrong way, is there?

Nine years sounds so long ago…..but the 3,285 days have whizzed by me like a fast train…..

I refuse to say happy anniversary today.

Love you beyond the moon.

Me

Local TV News Woman Turns Forty

- robin

The morning anchor-woman on our regular TV channel, is having a birthday this week. She is having people share with her, positive adoration about turning 40. (is that because 40 is so difficult?) I have been watching this and wondered if I am the only person who wants to scream….40? I LOVED being 40! Just wait till you turn 67 that’s when you need positive vibes!!!!

Today’s happy birthday episode was about mammograms. She has a family history and I am so glad that she did this segment. She had a successful mammogram and with a happy, high five ending that it was all clear. No cancer! BUT. She forgot the second half of the story. The part that happens after the radiologist sees a spot on your mammogram.

About one out of eight ladies are diagnosed with breast cancer. I wish that TV News Girl would have forgotten the 40 year old baseline mammo tripe and shown what happens when the radiologist sees something on your mammogram. It happens at all ages…..

I have had so many mammograms I cannot count them….the ones where the radiologist finds something suspicious…. numbers two. But it is what happens AFTER that is what is important. I wish someone had shown me what happens AFTER the suspicious mammogram. It would have been wonderful to know what exactly was ahead of me. I have had breast cancer twice. A different cancer in a different breast, 7 years apart. (2012, stage two-2029 stage one-early detection)

I know the routine now. Every woman should know the routine, because if it happens to you, you do not have time to think…and if it happens to one of your friends, you have an idea of what is going on and you can support your friend.

I really loved being 40. It was wonderful…and yes. I love being 67 too. (I guess)

Oh yes….GET YOUR MAMMOGRAM. Early detection saves lives. It saved mine twice.

To the 40 year old news person out there. Happy Birthday! Larry and I send our love.

Love you beyond the moon.

Me

Return To Me

- robin

I went to the DR yesterday and my blood pressure was so high, my DR is having me chart it for 2 weeks. (Yikes) I am also having a dozen tests done this week. My question is….when an office looks like this, who wouldn’t have high blood pressure?

Photos: Top: The outer waiting room. Middle: The Exam room. Bottom: the cartoon video instructing us how to meditate.

I walked around the lake a couple of times when I came home from the DR and it gave me time to think. After dealing with surgery and treatment from #2 breast cancer, I have not been eating well, days are NOT spent exercising like I should and anxiety is always nudging my brain…..it is just such an odd time.

It is an odd time for ALL OF US and we worry about the friends that we have not heard from. They are included in my daily prayers, hoping that they are just preoccupied and not ill.

There is a movie that I like. It is considered one of our Comfort Movies. It is “Return to Me”…..Have you seen it? The soundtrack is playing this morning and I feel very sentimental. Often, I wonder if everyone is feeling like me, having high blood pressure, prayerful and feeling sentimental?

Photo: Movie, Return to Me

Return to me is one of my favorite movies. It reminds me what is truly important in our lives. The music is one of my favorite soundtracks…. even Larry likes it. Please watch it if you feel inclined, or better yet, listen to the soundtrack. It will remind you what is important in your life. (LOVE)

I send love and calm to you today.

Love you beyond the moon.

Me

A Watercolor Evening

- robin

My Larry had been planning a picnic for last night. The plans had been in the “works” for a few weeks. He wanted to have a celebration of sorts. We did exactly that.

Yesterday all of my breast cancer tests came back clear. After being so anxious about it forever, I thought that I would be happier than I am. I am hugely relieved, of course. I am not happy though. It is probably because I am still so pissed off about last year, and I have not gotten over it.

Larry ordered food from one of our favorite restaurants and we headed to the Dallas Arboretum for dinner. The Arboretum was having music in the garden. In different gardens, there were different ARTists. We headed to the lake and settled in.

Our picnic dinner was from GAPCO PIZZA. (A Dallas tradition) We had a Caesar salad. veggie pizza, pizza poppers, garlic rolls and little chocolates. We drank Champagne and enjoyed a classical guitarist during dinner.

I kept thinking that Larry took a gamble, planning this amazing evening for us. What if my radiologist found something in my X rays again? Larry saw me frowning a few times and made me smile instead. Larry is kind of awesome like that. The night was lovely.

I had forgotten my good camera and only had my phone. Sorry about the photos.

Photo: Celebration at the Arboretum.

Photo: Sailboats were out on the lake last night. (like a watercolor painting)

It was a beautiful evening. People wore masks and social distanced. Twilight was my favorite because it made me feel like I was in a watercolor painting.

Larry’s celebration was perfection. I love him so much and I know that he is relieved today too.

Do you celebrate things too? How do you celebrate and do you include the people around you?

Love you beyond the moon and stars.

Me

Indescribable

- robin

On Saturday, Matilda and I made a video for North/West Texas Komen Walk as a shout out for TEAM BELIEVE.

I am not good at things like this, but Matilda is a pro and she loves it. (and comes by it naturally)

In 4 weeks (Sept 12th, 2020) the Dream A Dream Quilt will be raffled off. If you are interested and would like to donate To TEAM BELIEVE….please go to the link below and find the information.

Zero To Twenty Two

If you have any questions, please contact me at [email protected]

I took a few shots of the quilt today. It is twin size and hand made by me.

The mermaid block reads…..

“Close your eyes and dream a dream and seek the courage to make it real.

Reflect on the past, envision the future and embrace today with an open heart and soul.”

I loved making this quilt….I made it during treatments for my latest breast cancer journey. The positive feelings that this quilt gave me are indescribable. My wish is, that the positive energy stays with it forever.

I have been fighting breast cancer since July 2012. Now I am in remission.

I found both of my cancers due to early detection. That is why I support Komen. Every woman has the right to have a screening (mammogram) ….it is a matter of life and death. I am the poster girl for early detection.

Dream A Dream Quilt is ready…..please consider supporting early detection. (and becoming the new owner of a quilt)

Love you beyond the stars and moon.

Me

The Other Side

- robin

I am here. I have come out on the other side.

And I am still here.

Starting in early October, the journey has been difficult and memorable.

With the help of many amazing people,

I am moving forward with a very good prognosis.

You checked on me, sent cards and prayed.

So many amazing people.

I need to rest and recover from “treatment”,

looking forward to 2020, getting back in shape and most of

all…living my best life.

Photo: Candy Shoppe at the Dallas Arboretum

Love you beyond the moon.

Me

Temporary

- robin

Hello wonderful readers. I wanted to let you know that I am taking time off from The Blog. It is a temporary absence and as soon as I feel well, will be back.

I am leaving for surgery and treatment of breast cancer. I have been through this before and honestly do not remember how long it took me to feel better. I will take things one day at a time.

Please look me up on Instagram. Robin Tolbert or Pastelred is my name ( I am going to try to post a photo daily} . You can also email me at [email protected]

Thank you.

Love you BEYOND the moon.

Me