A Mothers Heart

 

In the ’80’s, when Larry and I wanted a family,

we discovered that I had to go on fertility drugs.

The drugs worked very fast with a first pregnancy……our Lauren.

But when I went on them, hoping for a second child, nothing worked.

Larry and I together decided that we were happy with one daughter.

About a year later, I became very ill and DR  told me that I was pregnant.

It was wonderful news.

Four months later Jamison was born.

We had two daughters.

I had two children. How absolutely perfect is that?

I have never read anything that describes how I feel about being the mother of two daughters.

Two beautiful, independent women.

I love them so much that my heart bursts when talking of them.

They do not  need me now.

I have become their, retired Mom.

That is OK, they have things handled.

But I must confess,

It is difficult for me to stand back if they need me.

At times of celebrations, I become  happy for them

and

at times of deep despair,

my heart breaks .

***

When the clouds come

I hope you can hear my heart.

A mothers heart.

It beats, smiles and cries

along with your

Life, Joy and sadness.

I pray that I did a good job,

being an example for you.

I stand back,

waiting

in the event you would need me.

But, you and I both know…

You’ve Got This.

Love you.

Me

The Unexpected Change In My Day

Yesterday was a beautiful day,

despite the tragedy around us.

I worked all day on various projects

keeping my mind and body occupied.

{will show you a new fun project once it is finished}

It took me forever to get the laundry done.

I missed Libby Pug Dog a lot.

Maybe, I was just in a grumpy mood?

Then while I was folding laundry….the doorbell rang.

DARN IT. Interruption!

But it was something good.

Flowers.

Oh My Gosh!

A huge,beautiful arrangement from Karen & John.

{we had dinner with Karen and John on Saturday. They were visiting from Atlanta}

The arrangement made my day.

This thoughtful gift changed my attitude immediately.

I have texted Karen and told her that,

but sometimes, people just say that.

Yesterday…

someone did something kind and it

changed my day.

Dear Karen & John.

Your friendship means so much to us

and

One day I hope to be as kind and thoughtful as you both are.

Thank you, Thank you, Thank you.

Love you.

Me

PS: Last night, I took the flowers back to the bedroom with me.

They look beautiful on the table next to the big bed.

Larry laughed at me.

 

 

 

 

 

From The Moment I Woke Up

Yesterday! I celebrated my last oncology appointment.

Dr S is my favorite Doc

and hugging him good bye was a milestone.

My Larry has taken such good care of me.

To be honest,

in these past 5 years a lot of merde has happened.

Things that happen in your life ,

you just want to hang your head and give up.

But between Larry and Dr S,

I wanted to do everything to get better.

***

We had tickets for a concert and picnic at the Arboretum yesterday.

Larry even had a cheese plate ready.

It was damp outside and gloomy…

honestly I just wanted to stay home.

So we had a picnic in bed.

Lets be honest,

there is something so special about Champagne in bed.

I made little grilled cheese sandwiches out of Hawaiian rolls

and

we had salad.

Larry made many toasts…and we smiled a lot.

Yesterday, I celebrated.

From the moment I woke, till I fell asleep last night.

It was my last day as a  cancer patient.

Now I am just like every other Paddington  Bear on the street.

Life is wonderful!

Love you.

Me

THE White Cake~ Jamison’s Favorite~ Chef Valentine

When my youngest child was small

she was a picky eater

and

did not like chocolate.

This is what I would make for

her on special occasions

called

THE White Cake.

{ this was recipe was requested by Karen}

THE White Cake

Make your favorite white cake. {8″rounds}

If it is from scratch or a box, no matter.

I use Dickinsons’s lemon Curd between the two layers.

{lemon curd is sweet, similar to a pudding}

Then I ice the entire cake.

I make buttercream icing from scratch….

but you can use tub icing , whatever is your favorite.

Any white icing will do.

Yesterday was warm and very humid….

the icing was temperamental….

but it tasted great.

There are THREE days left in September.

It is a perfect  time to enjoy THE White Cake.

Enjoy this day….

Love you.

Me.

Always Special

It is cloudy today

and

The Cottage is dark.

I will turn on music

and  start cooking.

We are having company for dinner tonight.

Our lovely British neighbors have company

and

tonight they will join us

{and sign the tablecloth}

Cake pans are out

and the oven is preheating.

A pair of pears are waiting

to sacrifice themselves for the cheese plate.

Preparing for guests is always special.

***

I’d best get busy.

Thank you for taking a moment to stop by.

Love you.

Me.

Walking The Runway

Last Saturday,

Matilda was in the Neiman Marcus

Children’s Fashion show.

It was so much fun and she loved it.

My camera was almost dead

but I captured a moment….

a sweet wonderful moment.

I can close my eyes and see Matilda walking down that runway.

and

am thankful that Lars and Josh included us at the event.

Yesterday was quiet at The Cottage.

Larry was closed off in his office all day

and

he answers yes, no and maybe

when he is so busy.

He loves his job.

He is gone to meetings today.

I will leave to do errands in a moment….

Today,

lets all try to walk with the same confidence

that Matilda had in the fashion show…

Love you.

Me

He Gives Out The Treats

This past week and weekend was crazy.

My blasted cold is hanging on just a little bit,

but I am feeling better every day.

Jami’s boyfriend was hurt while arresting a bad guy

and

has been in the hospital this past week.

Because he is a police officer, he had police protection

100% of the the time, even while he was in 2 surgeries.

I am sharing this because,

Larry and I took care of their dogs.

Jami was staying at the hospital last week with her guy.

We love her dogs…but they love Larry best of all.

He gives out the treats.

*****

Yesterday, was Sunday, Dinner and Movie.

STATE FAIR DAY!

We ate junk food,

piggies in a blanket, potato skins, cheese poppers

and

beer.

For dessert, we had cherry danish.

Larry loved it all….he smiled and said:

we have not eaten junk like this in ages. 

Our movie was…..

The Texas State Fair starts this week…..

Look for pictures soon, IF we go.

****

As a PS:

Larry and I do not have a relationship with Jami’s boyfriend,

but, we would be thankful if you would keep him

in your prayers while he recovers.

Family dynamics are difficult sometimes,

but that is where Faith comes in.

God has a plan.

I am so very blessed.

Please have a happy Monday.

Love you beyond the moon.

Me.

Casanova and Me

Yesterday, I spent the morning in Ft Worth, Texas.

I was at the Kimbell Museum of ART

viewing the Casanova exhibit.

Casanova! Really.

I truly did not expect much,

but  had a great time….

there were paintings, clothing of the period,

furniture and jewelry.

I loved it.

I was perhaps the only person there…

I did not expect to have such a good time alone.

But it was wonderful.

Oh wait, it got better…..

Larry made me breakfast for dinner.

I believe that I have my own Casanova, right here at The Cottage..

Love you.

Me

 

Dusty Collections

I have been cleaning the house.

Dusting little treasures

that mean the world only to me.

I have a passion for bitters bottles

and

old spice cabinets.

Have you ever thought about why people collect certain things?

My friend, Sally Jo, loves guns

and

Amanda collects books.

I wonder why they collect certain things?

I wonder what my collections say about me?

{I am not a hoarder}

Is a collection a comfort or a distraction?

I am not sure which it is…but I love colors and shapes….

There is a calmness about keeping what you love around you.

It is better than a glass of wine.

{ please don’t tell Larry I said that}

Love you.

Me